Ten Weeks

We're in the double digits, folks!  That deserves another happy dance! (Oot oot, do the happy dance!)

Sorry I am just now posting my update...I swear, Peanut takes every bit of energy I have these days!  I am definitely doing more around the house than I was before (and running a few errands here and there), but my energy level is no where near what it used to be!  Maybe I'll be one of those lucky women who get a burst of energy back in the second trimester??  We shall see! ;)

So, now that Peanut has been incubating for ten whole weeks, let's see what changes have occurred!

Symptoms:

-nausea (this disappeared for several days but then came back with a vengeance...ugh.  But still no vomiting! PTL!)
-mild cramps/pressure in my lower abdomen
-exhaustion
-stuffy/bloody nose
-moodiness
-bloating (definitely more noticeable at night)
-reflux
-bubble gut (it gets quite painful at times, too!)
-bigger (and not near as tender) tah-tahs

Size of Baby:

Prune (about 1.5 inches long)

Milestones/Happenings:

Peanut is starting to grow little nails and has tiny teeth budding underneath the gums.  His (or her) bone and cartilage is forming, too.  He can flex his wrists, elbows, and knees now (I bet he's already practicing his happy dance for his Mommy! lol).

Food Cravings:

-boiled peanuts (OMG...I can't get enough!  Actually gave myself an upset tummy today from inhaling a small army of these)
-Subway meatball sub
-potatoes (still)
-sausage/bacon
-Popeyes chicken tenders
-Bonefish fish tacos (haven't gotten these yet...might work on that this week ;) )
-pepperoni pizza

Food Aversions:

-believe it or not...my usually Tuesday vietnamese meal does NOT sound good (last week or now)
-most fish
-most pork (except for bacon and sausage...yummm...)
-most fruits/veggies

Baby Bump Pics:

That's right, guys, it's time to post The Bump!  Eek!  I have been taking weekly pictures (in the same spot, using natural light if possible, first thing in the morning, before eating or drinking anything) so you can see the progression.  Sorry if some of them are a little dark---it's been a little dreary outside lately, so that affects the lighting in my foyer, which is where I take the pictures.  But, nonetheless, here is Peanut making his/her debut! :)

Week 5 (pardon the bloat):

Week 6:

Week 7:

Week 8:

Week 9:

Week 9.5 (Christmas Day):

Week 10:

Do you see what I see??? I see a Peanut!!!!  Ahhhhh!  How exciting!  Now, I'm still in the "Is she pregnant or just bloated?" stage, mostly depending on what I'm wearing.  But The Bump is definitely there and it's not going away!  Woohoo!

What a blessing to be able to watch something growing in there!  Every day I am reminded of God's power and love when I look at this belly (or feel those uncomfortable symptoms that I've come to love because I know Peanut's growing), and I just have to stop and thank God for this miracle that He has given us!  James 1:17 says, "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father who created the lights in the heavens..."  Thank you, Father, for this perfect gift! :)

Nine Weeks

Wow.  I can't believe I'm already nine weeks (and two days, to be precise) pregnant!  Time flies when you're making a human being! lol

I'm sorry I didn't get to post this Pregnancy Progress update on Saturday, but we were down South with my sweet family.  I always enjoy time with my peeps, but this holiday season was even sweeter since we got to celebrate Peanut and the awesome news of my little brother's engagement (to the most amazing girl ever, I might add)!  We are so blessed!

Ok, so here's the scoop on Peanut's progress...

Symptoms:

-very light nausea (usually only when I'm very hungry or have eaten too much)
-fatigue (that's a given!)
-increased appetite (most of the time...some times nothing sounds good)
-fuller (still slightly tender) tah-tahs
-indigestion/reflux
-gassiness/bloating

Milestones/Happenings:

Peanut loses his little nub of a tail this week!  Hopefully that means my husband will stop calling him a turtle! lol  His eyes are fully formed, but his eyelids are fused shut and will stay that way for the next 16 weeks or so.  He's more active and may wiggle around in his sac during his waking hours (although I still can't feel it).

Cravings: (These come and go so quickly, it's hard to keep up!)

-any type of potatoes
-my Mom's southwestern chicken egg rolls (got to fulfill this craving this weekend--woohoo!)
-sweet tea
-Subway meatball subs
-soft serve ice cream
-boiled peanuts (had to race to the roadside stand that sells these before they closed on the way back into town yesterday...let this be known: my husband ROCKS! lol)
-sausage/bacon (these are the the only kinds of pork Peanut wants right now)
-Bonefish Grill fish tacos and Bang Bang shrimp (hey, Bonefish...if I advertise for you on here, can I pleeeease get a free delivery of this sent to my house?? :) )
-nice cold drinks

Aversions:

-most seafood (except for shrimp and mild fish, like tilapia)
-most pork products (chops, loin, and ham)
-hot beverages
-saltines (they're starting to get a little old...)
-Mexican (I attempted this again last week...NO BUENO!)
-most fruits and veggies still

Baby Bump:

There's definitely some bump action going on below my belly button now!  I'm going to see how it looks next weekend when I hit ten weeks, and if it still looks like baby and not bloat, I'll post some pictures on here! ;)

Alrighty, time to wrap the last few gifts and put the finishing touches on the dessert for tonight!  My husband, Peanut, and I want to wish each and every one of you a VERY Merry Christmas!  Remember that although this season is filled with love and laughter as we gather with our families and friends, eat lots of yummy food, and open loads of thoughtful gifts, JESUS CHRIST is the real reason we celebrate this day!  Let us all remember to give thanks to the Father, who sent His only Son to be the ultimate sacrifice, so that we can all spend eternity in heaven one day!  Happy Birthday, Baby Jesus! :)

Let the Holiday Festivities Begin!

Hey guys!  This is going to be a really quick post, since my husband and I are trying to get things ready so we can head down South to see my wonderful family for the weekend!

Peanut is still doing great (as far as I can tell from the outside, lol)! Every morning I check my belly to see if there's a bump making it's appearance yet, and while I do think I see somewhat of a difference below my belly button, it's not quite ready to be posted yet.  Sorry guys! ;)  The "bump" gets significantly bigger as the day goes on, and then goes down by the morning (which, to me, screams "bloat" not "baby").  I'm definitely ready for my belly to "pop" so that I know Peanut is growing in there, but I'm sure that baby belly is right around the corner!

Since I'll be out of town this weekend (when I would usually do my "Pregnancy Progress" post), I plan on doing that update when we're get back on Monday.  So stay tuned!  I hope y'all have a safe and fun weekend!

Eight Week Ultrasound

I love that every time I blog now, I have even MORE good news to share!  It makes my heart overflow with joy and gratitude for all of the many blessings God is showering us with!

Today, on top of getting to see our little Peanut (who now resembles a precious little gummy bear!), I was also told that the clot has completely resolved and I am cleared to get off bed rest!  Ahhhhh!  PTL! How awesome is that??! That means that a) I won't be spending Christmas with the hub's entire family piled in my bedroom (not that I'd mind, guys, as long as I get to see y'all! lol), b) my husband and I (and Peanut) get to make the five hour trip to see my family this weekend, and c) we don't have to go back for another u/s for a whole two weeks!  Needless to say, I am one happy girl!

Although I'm off of bed rest, Dr T still wants me to take it easy...which isn't too hard for me because I have the energy of a drugged snail right now.  I do wish I could go for a leisurely walk a few times a week, but he put the kilbosh on that and said I can only go outside to "stroll" around for a minute and get some fresh air but not take any walks around the block just yet.  Bummer.  I was hoping that taking short walks would help increase my energy level, but I guess that will have to wait for a few more weeks!  So guess where I've spent most of my first day officially off bed rest?  That's right---in bed! LOL Maybe I'll be more energetic tomorrow and venture out into the living room again...or better yet, maybe I'll go down the street and get a much-needed pedicure! ;)

Now for the good news on Peanut...I swear, every week I am amazed at how my love for him (or her) grows!  And at how the little guy physically grows, too!  He is measuring right on track still, making me 8W3D, and he's got the most adorable little arms and legs that definitely do help him to look more like a baby (or a "turtle" per my husband and brother) and less like a tadpole.  Dr T said he was sleeping when we did the u/s (because he wasn't wiggling around at the moment), and that he's already gotten into a sleep/wake pattern.  Peanut's heart was still flickering away on the screen and sounds wonderfully strong and rhythmic.  Seeing and hearing our little miracle is definitely the best way to start the day!

So, for today's photo op, Peanut chose a full frontal pose, which shows off his tiny arms/legs and the tiny bit of embryonic tail (bottom part of his spinal column) he has left (no, Mom, that is NOT a winkie! LOL).

*Now, I must warn you: this picture comes with a Major Cuteness Warning.  The extreme levels of cuteness that are exhibited in this photo may make you involuntarily giggle or smile uncontrollably. This is completely normal and to be expected.*

 

Ok, I know I've asked this before, but isn't he THE cutest thing EVER??  I think he's looking more and more like me every day (hence the increasing levels of cuteness...hehehe).  This picture quickly found it's way to the home screen on my phone...do you blame me?? :)

Eight Weeks

Eight weeks down, only thirty-two more to go! ;)

Well, I can officially say that I feel F-A-T.   I haven't tried on any of my regular pants (since I don't go anywhere other than Dr T's once a week), but I'm quite sure there would be some muffin-top action going on if I did.  I woke up this morning to a definite "pooch" below my belly button, but not the cute kind that screams "baby bump", but more the kind that screams "too many Danish wedding cookies". lol  But that's okay, because that just means that Peanut is growing and that a more definitive baby belly is on it's way!  Yaaay!

So here is Peanut's Pregnancy Progress update for this week...

Symptoms:

-nausea (more so now when I'm hungry, thinking about food at all, or when I have reflux)
-reflux (it helps to prop my head up on some pillows for at least two hours after I eat)
-mild/dull cramping (this started more yesterday, but I know he's got a lot of growing to do!)
-"backed-up" (if you know what I mean...I know, TMI, but seriously---this is quite painful)
-bubble guts (24/7, but it definitely gets worse right after I eat)
-not as sore but still tender tah-tahs
-fatigue
-restlessness
-mood swings...sorry, honey :)
-bloating (blaaaaah)
-stuffy/bloody nose (mostly in the morning)
-peeing every thirty minutes (not a ton at once, but my bladder feels full quicker because of the pressure my uterus is putting on it)

Size of Baby:

Raspberry (a little over 1/2 inch---wow!!)

Milestones/Happenings:

Peanut is now moving his arms/legs and kicking around in there (although I can't feel it yet)!  My uterus is now the size of a grapefruit (whereas it was plum-sized before Peanut came along), which definitely explains the dull cramps!

Cravings:

-pizza
-potatoes in pretty much any form (mashed, fried, scalloped, etc)
-soft serve ice cream
-oreos
-baked doritos
-KFC mac-n-cheese
-my Dad's goulash
-cold beverages (although I've never really liked ice because it hurts my teeth)
-Subway meatball sub

Food Aversions:

-most veggies/fruits
-pork chops/loin...well, pretty much any type of pork
-any hot beverages
-most seafood (except for shrimp)

I can't wait for our appointment on Tuesday!  If things look okay, I might get off bed rest AND we won't have to go back for two weeks!  (Although this is a little bittersweet...I love getting to see our cute little nugget every week!)  Please keep praying as Peanut keeps growing and God keeps working! :)

A Note to Peanut

I got this sweet idea from my good friend, Jessie, who created a blog for her son, Grayson, which she used to write him "love notes" while he was still in utero. It's wonderful to think that one day he'll have all of those letters to look back on and observe the changes his Mommy (and Daddy) went through during the pregnancy!  I don't plan on doing multiple posts to Peanut, but I do want to give him a little shout-out today to let him know what a blessing he is! :)

My Dearest Peanut,

Where do I start??  Your Daddy and I are absolutely thrilled about meeting you in just 7 1/2 more months!  We've been praying for you for a very long time now, and went through a lot of not-so-fun times to get where we are today (with you in my belly), but it was well worth the wait!  God knew exactly what He was doing, and I know He was just making sure Daddy and I were ready for you (which we are!).   July can't come quick enough!

Even though you're only the size of a raspberry, your Daddy and I love you VERY much already! (We've actually loved you since you were just a teeny-tiny cell, but I'll explain more on that later and show you your first "picture".)  We have seen you grow so much in the last few weeks, and we even got to see your heartbeat, which was a-maz-ing!  You already seem so vibrant and strong---I'd better have my running shoes on when you're born, cause I have a feeling you're gonna be an energetic little guy (or girl)!  

Although I love feeling you grow and feel all of the symptoms that comes along with that (being queasy, wanting to eat food straight out of a deep fryer, peeing every thirty minutes, etc), I do have to ask one thing of you right now:  please remember that Mommy's uterus is very tender right now and trying to stretch a lot to make more room for you, so try not to do any acrobatic moves or treat Mommy's tummy like a jungle gym just yet.  Between my intestines, bladder, and you, things are getting pretty tight in there, and it sure does get uncomfortable at times!  Thank you in advance, my sweet little nugget of joy! :)

Well, that's about it for now.  Mommy has to go tinkle again and find something to eat (this is pretty much how my days go now that you're in there).  But one more thing before I go...

If you don't remember anything else from this "letter", please remember this:  We count YOU, our little Peanut, as the greatest blessing in our lives, and we thank God every single day for granting us the opportunity to be your parents.  Don't ever forget that we love you more than words can say, and that God (the Big Man Upstairs who made you---more on Him later, too) loves you even more than that!   

Love Always,

Your Mommy 

Seven Week Ultrasound

I never thought I'd say this...but Tuesday is quickly starting to become my favorite day of the week! Not only is that the day I get my vietnamese food fix (yes, every Tuesday...no exceptions, lol), but that's also the day we get to see how our little one is growing and hear that precious heartbeat of his! Totally makes my week! :)

So, I'm sure you're wondering how Peanut is doing and how that yucky clot is looking...well, I'm pleased to say I only have good news this week!  Yaaay!

Peanut is doing great and growing like a weed!  You can see in the pic I am posting below that he has definitely tripled in size since last week!  He is actually measuring 7W3D today (two days ahead), which puts him right back on track with my initial due date calculation of July 27th!  (We'll just stick with the 27th-29th for now, since the gestational age varies so much in the first trimester.)  His little heart was just a flickering away, and you could definitely tell that he has more of a defined "head" this week.  I'm completely, 100% in love with this baby...how can it possibly get any better than this??

As for that unwanted clot...it's almost completely gone!  Woohoo!  PTL!!  Dr T really had to search for it this morning, and once he found it, he was shocked to see how much it has shrank!  He recommends at least one more week of bed rest, just to be safe, and we'll check it out again next week and see if it's completely gone.  This means I may not have to spend Christmas in bed!  Sing it with me, folks: Happy dance, do the happy dance!  Oot, oot, do the happy dance!  This is above and beyond what I expected to hear this week, and it just further validates what we've been saying/trusting in all along...NOTHING is impossible with God!

Ok, so who wants to see Peanut's weekly photo op?  He'd better get used to posing and having his picture taken, because he has one photo-obsessed mommy! ;)

(Added bonus to this week's ultrasound pic: we recorded the heartbeat!  I have listened to it at least once an hour since this morning's appointment--okay, okay, maybe twice an hour--and couldn't wait to share this amaze-fest with my blog family!)

Here's the close up shot first...see how big he's gotten?!  He's gonna be a tall, skinny one, just like his daddy, lol.

Then here's the video...you can actually see the heart flickering!  Amaaaaazing!  I melt every time I listen to it!  (FYI: It may take a few minutes to buffer...sorry!)

Sweetest.  Sound.  EVER.  (Sigh)

So, once again, I just have to stop and praise God for his awesomeness!  I praise Him for this journey and all of the ups and downs along the way.  I praise Him for the constant peace, love, and comfort He has given us throughout it all.  I praise Him for His faithfulness in hearing our prayers and blessing us beyond belief.  I praise Him for using me to touch others and further His kingdom.  I praise Him for what He has already done and for what's to come.  Who's praising Him with me?? :)

Seven Weeks

You know what that means....time for another Pregnancy Progress update!

Symptoms:

-nausea (it seems to be worse towards dinner time and through the middle of the night...ugh)
-tired all the time, but yet I can't seem to nap!
-"bubble gut" (this is what I like to call gas...makes it sound more "cutesy" and not so disgusting, doesn't it? ;) )
-sore tah-tah's (the severity still varies day by day)
-stretching/pressure/ache in lower abdomen/groin
-achy joints (this seems to be a little better this week)
-stomach growling/feels empty even after I've just eaten (this makes me feel more nauseous, too)
-acid reflux/heartburn (I am prone to this already if I eat certain things, but now even water gives me indigestion)
-the weird dreams continue

Size of the Baby:

Blueberry (I goofed and said he was this size last week, when actually he was only the size of a sweet pea...oops!  Sorry, Peanut! Mommy loves you, and she's just so excited to know you're growing!)

Milestones/Happenings:

Peanut's face is starting to become a little more defined (where his eyes/ears will be), and the umbilical cord is forming this week.

Cravings:

(OMG...these are changing every minute!)

-macaroni and cheese (but I think I've reached my limit on this...now it's starting to turn my stomach)
-danish wedding cookies (these were one of my faves growing up, and I guess it'll be one of Peanut's, too!)
-vietnamese food (specifically pork and vermicelli...yum, yum!)
-cheese grits (thanks for satisfying this craving on a regular basis, GG!)
-sugary cereal
-fried foods (in small quantities only)
-pizza (haven't tried this yet, but I've been wanting it for a few days now)

Aversions: (Things Peanut does NOT like...found out the hard way!)

-catfish (which I usually love), and most seafood
-ginger ale
-chinese food (this was a craving last week, but after trying it...not so much)
-bananas
-salads (I sure hope this changes--I love a good salad!)
-some veggies (squash, tomatoes, etc...which I also could have scarfed down in mass quantity before)
-mexican (much to my dismay)
-coffee (the thought of it makes me want to gag)

Isn't it weird how our taste buds totally change in such a short period of time??  Before I was pregnant, I could watch Food Network and my mouth would start to water at pretty much everything on the screen.  But now, I get queasy looking at/thinking about most of the stuff they're cooking!  Sorry, Giada and Rachel...but y'all make me gag sometimes.  It's not your fault though, I promise! lol

So...who's excited for the ultrasound tomorrow???  Me!  Me!  Oh, oh, pick me!!  :)  I'm just praying that Peanut is growing right on track, his little heart is beating up a storm, and that this pesky clot is shrinking (or at least not getting any bigger)!  I'm trusting in the power of prayer and the knowledge that all things are possible with God!

Just Another Lazy Day...

Sorry I've been MIA, y'all!  But I promise Peanut and I are a-okay!

I'm still on bed rest, and I swear, I am more tired laying around doing nothing than I am when I'm out and about!  It seems like I have a small list of things I want to accomplish during the day (email a friend, crochet a hat, etc), but by the time night comes, I've accomplished nothing!  Man, how lazy am I?? lol

I've moved from the big fluffy chair to the bed, which actually is way more comfortable.  Especially since I have a huge hematoma on the right side of my tush (thanks to the shots), so it's nice to be able to lay in a position where it doesn't press on the sore cheek.  Not to mention, I have the whole king-sized bed and TV to myself, so I can spread out my gossip magazines and watch TLC and Food Network till my heart is content! ;)

I plan on posting my Pregnancy Progress update on Monday, since that's the day I actually turn seven weeks (making me 6W5D today---woohoo!), and then we have our next ultrasound Tuesday morning at 7am!  Please keep praying and stay tuned for more updates on Peanut! :)

Second Ultrasound

So, I've got great news, and I've got some not so great news.  Which one should we start with?  The "great"?  That's what I thought. ;)

(Drum roll, please...)

We were able to see AND hear Peanut's heartbeat this morning!  Ahhhhhh!  It sounded like a nice, strong "gallop"---definitely the most beautiful sound in the whole wide world!  Dr T didn't give me an exact number of beats per minute, but he was quite pleased with how things sounded and looked!  So was my hubby...I think he's already as in love with this little guy as I am!  Even though he's seen/heard fetal ultrasounds and heartbeats before (he used to work in an ER and Urgent Care), it is never the same as hearing YOUR child's heartbeat and seeing the little white flicker of their heart on the monitor!  Totally life-changing!

Peanut is measuring 6W1D (two days behind what I "calculated", but that was just a rough estimate), which is fantastic!  This makes my due date somewhere around July 29th--eek!.  As you can tell by the picture below, he (I'm assuming it's a boy until proven otherwise, lol) almost doubled in size already, and should continue to TRIPLE in size by the end of this week.  Isn't is amazing how fast they grow??

Here's my sweet little guy's snapshot for today...he's so photogenic, don't ya think?? :)

(By the way...yes, there is still only ONE Peanut in there!  Looks like it's a singleton pregnancy, folks!  But that's just fine with us!  Sorry to disappoint all of you guys who were betting on multiples! lol)

Ok, so now the "not so great" news...

I have a fairly large blood clot in my uterus, right above Peanut's gestational sac.  This is more than likely the source of my bleeding/spotting from last week.  It's called a subchorionic hematoma (or blood around the chorion, which is the space between the placenta and the uterus), and it occurs in about 1% of all pregnancies.

This clot came from a tear in the side of my uterus, but the exact cause is unknown.  Our only speculations are that a) it occurred during implantation,  b) there was a second sac (twin) that was developing earlier on and tore away from the uterine wall, or c) something happened to Peanut and his/her sac pulled away from the uterus, causing it to bleed.  No matter how it happened, the important thing is that it's already clotting up and not actively bleeding (PTL!).

When I asked how large it was, Dr T said, "Large enough to raise some concern".  (Oh, gee, thanks, Dr T!)  Although he didn't give me an exact measurement, it appears to be about the size of Peanut's sac at this point.  His concern is that the clot will completely pull away from the uterine wall, and in doing so, take Peanut with it (since it's on top of the sac).  In order to prevent this, he took me off of my Baby Aspirin and ordered me to be on (you guessed it) bed rest.  I am to stay on bed rest for as long as it takes my body to reabsorb the clot (which can be weeks or months), OR until he deems it small enough for me to safely move around.  I will go back for another u/s next Tuesday at 7am, and then weekly until the issue is resolved.

Dr T made me feel a little better by saying that 90% of women with SCH's (that's the abbreviation for it) go on to heal and have normal pregnancies.  He said that usually the 10% of those that miscarry are usually women who "do too much" and don't stick to their bed rest.  Trust me, I'm going to be a good patient and follow the doctor's orders! Anything for my little miracle! ;)

So that's the news for the day, guys!  I am trying my hardest to focus on the positive (Peanut's amazing heartbeat and growth!), and give all of my worries to the Lord!  My prayer is that He protects this tiny life, continues to grow him to be healthy and strong, and that He will shrink this clot and the worry associated with it.  I am confident that God has allowed this unexpected hurdle to arise in my path for a reason, and that He will help me to clear it and continue on down this road to Mommyhood!  No matter what happens, to God be the glory, for great things He has done!

Six Weeks

(Well, technically, I'm 6W1D, but whose counting?? ;) )

Another week down, and still going strong!  There haven't been any big changes since Friday's post (although the spotting has almost completely stopped--PTL!), but I wanted to continue on with my Pregnancy Progress posts, so here's the weekly update!

Symptoms:

-occasional waves of nausea (whether I eat or not), but no vomiting (yet)
-mild pressure/dull cramps every now and then (not lasting long)
-sore/swollen tah-tah's (the severity of this fluctuates every day)
-bloating after eating even small meals
-feeling "empty", even after I just ate ( my stomach is constantly growling!)
-lots of saliva...like you have before you throw up (gross, I know)
-fatigue
-restlessness
-lower backache (although not nearly as bad)
-sore joints (knees/hips/ankles)
-frequent urination
-very weird dreams that usually involve food (example: a few nights ago, I was with the cast of the "Wizard of Oz", but we were here in town instead of Munchkin Land and stopped off for BBQ before following the "yellow brick road", which happened to be one of our main highways)

Size of the Baby:

Sweet Pea (he/she is now 10,000 times bigger than they were at fertilization!  Wow!)

Milestones/Happenings:

Peanut now has a brain, folks!  As if that's not exciting enough, his/her heart should start beating (if it's not already) sometime this week!  It's arms and legs will also start to form this week, making it look a little more like a baby and less like a tadpole.  The yolk sac that we saw on the u/s last Wednesday will keep feeding Peanut until the placenta takes over, which will be some time around nine to twelve weeks.  

Cravings: (I wanted to add this part, since it's changing all the time, and some of them are pretty odd)

-cereal (Apple Jacks and Cocoa Puffs)
-asian food (hibachi, vietnamese, chinese, cooked sushi--it doesn't matter!)
-ramen noodles
-cheezits
-diet coke (I allow myself one of these a day, but don't always drink it all)
-pickles (not alone---I like to add extra to my Chik-Fil-A sandwich and chili dogs and whatnot)

(I know...totally unhealthy food choices, aren't they??  I hope this changes soon, because I'm usually a pretty "smart" eater!  But if Peanut wants it, Peanut gets it! Hehehe...)

I still don't think it's totally sank in yet that I'm pregnant, but I don't think it will till I start to show and then feel him/her moving around in there!  I have to remind myself whenever I start to feel puny that it's "normal" and all due to our tater tot growing rapidly inside me!  What an amazing experience!

Our next u/s is scheduled for Tuesday morning at 7am (when we should hopefully see the heartbeat--eek!), so please stay tuned till then!

Grow, Peanut, Grow!

Just wanted to give y'all a quick update on Peanut and myself!

I keep feeling off and on mild pressure with some quick, sharp pains every now and then, which I like to assume is the little guy stretching out and getting nice and cozy.

The brown spotting continues, but it only shows up two or three times during the day.  No more red bleeding though--whew!

I keep having waves of nausea throughout the day, but mainly at night.  I can't keep up with it, though! It's never at the same time of the day, and some times it's when I'm hungry, and some times it's when I've just eaten (or taken my medicine).  But I've stocked up on saltines, ginger ale, and peppermints, so I'm all set for when it decides to join me!  (Side Note: Is it weird that my husband and I LIKE it when I'm queasy?? We take it as a good sign that things are happening in there, so we're actually praying for nausea now! lol)

My back ache has definitely improved (I think I did waaaay too much trying to decorate last weekend, because it was pretty darn painful on Monday/Tuesday!), but I still notice a dull ache at night and in the morning.  I've read that the hormones produced during pregnancy (Progesterone and Relaxin) causes a woman's ligaments to loosen in order to make room in her pelvis.  Well, after all that back pain earlier in the week, I think it's safe to say my ligaments are nice and loose now and ready for Peanut to grow!

My husband bumped into Dr T again at work today, and he asked how I was doing and when we were coming in for an u/s.  My hubby filled him in about the bleeding/spotting and the u/s from Wednesday, and Dr T was very surprised that there was only ONE baby in there!  He said with my numbers, he was sure it was twins!  He also said he wasn't concerned at all about the spotting and that he actually expects it, but he would still like me to rest as much as possible.

Even though he wasn't concerned about the spotting, he was a little worried about me starting my new job on December 10th, and suggested to my husband that I push back my start date, if possible, to allow me a few more weeks of relaxation to let Peanut get situated in his new environment.  He said he'll feel better about me working once we clear the next two hurdles, which are a) seeing the heartbeat next week (please, Lord, please!), and b) hitting the eight week mark, since the risk of a miscarriage goes down at that point. So....once I heard this, I called the HR department at the hospital and got my start date changed to January 7th!  Woohoo!  That would make me eleven weeks by the time I start--almost the whole first trimester!  Sounds like a good plan to me! ;)

So, now we just do more of what we've been doing for the last few weeks: wait and pray!  I am trying my hardest not to fret about every little spot of blood I see, cramp I feel, or fluctuation in symptoms, but instead remember that God already knows the outcome, and it is in His mighty hands!  I am just going to cherish every moment of this pregnancy and praise God for the amazing opportunity to carry this miracle! :)

First Ultrasound

Whew.  

These last forty-eight hours have been a roller coaster of emotions, but I think I've finally calmed down enough to be able to post, so here it goes!

Monday night I started having some sharp gas-like pains, so I took it easy and laid down to see if it would help.  Then, upon one of my five-hundred daily pee-trips, I saw what every pregnant woman dreads...blood.  One small gush of red blood with a few small clots (sorry if that grosses some of you guys out!), and then nothing except for when I wiped.  I never had any cramps or anything, and once I passed the clots, the sharp pains went away.  Of course, I started crying and having a mini-freak out session (who wouldn't?!).  After a few minutes, I calmed down (with the help of my wonderful husband) and laid down for the rest of the night.  The whole time, my heart was aching but determined to trust in God's plan.

The next morning, I called Dr T's office as soon as the clock turned seven.  They put me through to the nurse, Kim, who didn't seem concerned at all.  She said they see lots of first trimester bleeding/spotting in their office, and to stay on bedrest for the day and come in Wednesday morning for our scheduled u/s.  She also told me to try and relax and not worry....yeah, right!  That's funny! lol

All day long (which seemed like an eternity since I was confined to the couch, alone with my thoughts and Google), I had dark brown spotting.  Never a ton, but definitely there, and definitely enough to worry me.  Around noon, I started to have some mild cramping, but nothing as bad as when I get my period.  The cramping and spotting both continued throughout the day, but finally stopped once I was in bed for the night.  All we could do is pray and wait...which is the hardest thing ever!  

Finally, today arrived.  I woke up a bundle of nerves, and I could barely get myself ready for our appointment.  My sweet husband got to go with me, which made me feel so much better, but I was still shaking like a leaf while we waited for my name to be called.  

After about thirty minutes, it was our turn.  The u/s tech and nurse (Denese) came in and I briefed them on the activities of the last few days.  Just like before, neither seemed concerned, and said that between the hormones and the growing uterus, some bleeding and cramping is totally normal (and almost expected).  Then came the u/s.  I held my breath and waited while they both examined the screen.  The u/s tech finally turned the monitor towards us, and this is what we saw...

See that black oval in the middle of the picture?  That's our little peanut's gestational sac!!!!!  And the white splotch inside of it is the "yolk sac", which is what provides the baby with nutrients until the placenta can form.  The nurse seemed very happy that the yolk sac had already formed, which, in turn, made us very happy!  I couldn't stop smiling, and the hubs was definitely relieved (and silently beaming) to see that everything was okay!  

They didn't give us a gestational age yet, but I think it's safe to assume I'm still 5W4D.  We are supposed to go back next Tuesday (6W3D) at 7am for another u/s, and hopefully we can see the heartbeat by then!  Eeeeek!!!!

I'm sure you noticed that there's only one little guy in there now.  That doesn't necessarily rule out the chance of multiples, because the u/s tech said sometimes they "hide" behind the other sac, and can't be seen until later.  So for all of you guys out there who are thinking it was going to be twins (or more!), there's still hope! ;)

Of course, there are a million and one thoughts running through my head right now, but mainly I am thinking, "Thank You, Lord.  Thank You, Lord.  Thank You, LORD!"  Once again, I am completely amazed by God's faithfulness, love, and blessings!  I can't imagine ever feeling as good as I did when I first laid eyes on our precious tater tot, but I have an inkling that the blessings are just beginning and there will be many, many more life-changing moments to come! :) 

Thank you all again for all of your thoughts and prayers!  We're far from the "safe zone", so please keep praying for God's protection and His will to be done.  I read this verse yesterday, and I found it so fitting, so I wanted to share it with y'all:  "Jesus said, 'Have faith in God.  I tell you the truth, if you say to the mountain, "May you be lifted up and thrown into the sea", it will happen.  But you must really believe it will happen and have no doubt in your heart." That's the key to truly trusting in God, is believing that ANYTHING is possible with Him!  If you still doubt that this is true, just look at that beautiful picture again! What a miracle! ;)

Beta #3

This is it, y'all...the third and final beta!  And the results are in!

I figured that if my HCG level continued to double every forty-eight hours since last Wednesday, it should have been somewhere around 5,300 yesterday.  Well, as always, my little peanuts are overachievers, because my level this morning was...

7198!

That's a doubling time of 49.1 hours, which is perfect, because the doubling time starts to increase as the levels get higher.  The nurse said Dr T is very happy with how things look and wants us to come in Wednesday morning at 7am for our first ultrasound!  MAJOR EEK!  We will get to see how many tator tots are cooking in there, and possibly see their little hearts beating (but sometimes you can't see this until closer to six weeks)!  Don't worry, I'll be getting lots of pictures! ;)

I've said it before and I'll say it again: How good is my God????!  He never ceases to amaze me!  I just can't stop praising His name for getting us this far and for these amazing little miracles!  What a MIGHTY God we serve!

Ahhhh! I'm so excited I can't sit still!  Time to do something productive to get out some of this nervous energy! lol  Please keep those prayers coming, and I'll update ASAP on Wednesday!

Five Weeks

That's right, folks---I'm (unofficially) five weeks preggo today!  Gaaaaaah!

I figure I'm this far along based on this 5-Day FET calculator I found online.  I plugged in my transfer date and it tells me how far along I am, when my due date is, and then all sorts of other milestone dates (trimester stages, heartbeat, etc).  Pretty cool, huh?

We will have a more definitive gestational age and due date (which, as of right now, is July 27th for one baby and July 5th for twins) once we do our first u/s, which hopefully will be sometime this week!  I just can't wait to see our little peanut (or maybe the both of them--eek!) on the screen and know that everything is okay!  Monday can't here quick enough! :)

So, I wanted to do something I've seen on other blogs to help you guys keep up with the progress of the pregnancy.  Every week, I'll post with the title of how far along I am, and then list my current symptoms, any milestones and happenings for the week, the size of the little one(s), and a belly pic (once I actually start to show).  Of course, I'll still post my usual random thoughts and ramblings in between pregnancy posts.  How's that sound?  Okay, so let's get started!

Symptoms: 

-on and off nausea (mainly when I'm hungry)
-restlessness
-fatigue (with crazy bursts of energy every now and then)
-extreme bloating (I feel like I'm four months already!)
-gassiness (major apologies to the hubs for this one!)
-sore/swollen tah-tahs (I'll take the swollen, but could live without the sore part!)
-lower back pain
-frequent urination (I get up at least twice a night)
-crazy sense of smell/things smell "weird"
-achy muscles/joints
-heaviness/fullness/pressure in lower abdomen

Size of the Baby(ies):

Apple seed

Milestones/Happenings:

The snow babies are quickly multiplying their cells, which will soon form their central nervous, circulatory, digestive, and reproductive systems (as well as their bones, muscles, etc).  They look more like tadpoles right now, but in the next few weeks, they'll start to look more and more like babies!

Alrighty, that's all for now!  Only two more days until Beta #3!  Praying for another good number and for God to continue to protect these little tator tots that are miraculously baking inside me! :)

Beta #2

O.  M.  G.

I thought I was gonna have a heart attack waiting!  The nurse FINALLY called me at about 3:55pm (which was after I called the office and got transferred to the answering service, telling me they were already closed for the holiday...which of course freaked me out).  But I quickly forgot about having to wait all day when she told me the results...

1325!!!!!!

That's a "doubling time" of 32.3 hours, which is GREAT!  The usual doubling time for HCG levels is 24-72 hours this early on, and as the numbers increase, so does the doubling time.  So we're looking good! Oot oot!

After I got off the phone, I breathed a huge sigh of relief, told my husband (who could tell it was good news by the look on my face)...and then started crying like a baby! lol  Words cannot express how grateful I am and how utterly blessed I feel!  God amazes me every day with His mercy and love! I'm thankful for every day I am given and every blessing I've received, but I have even MORE to give thanks for this Thanksgiving Day!  Eeeek! :)

Well, now that's we've cleared this hurdle, we have one more beta to get through, which will be done next Monday at 9am (due to the holidays, I can't have it drawn Friday...bummer!).  When the HCG level reaches 3000 (which could very well be Monday), we can do out first u/s (yaaaaay!) and hopefully see our little sticky peanut(s)!

I'll post more in the next few days, but for now, I'm going to go bask in the good news with my Baby Daddy (no longer "Future" Baby Daddy---woohoo)!  I hope everyone has a safe, happy Thanksgiving weekend!

PS: Thank you all for faithfully praying; please don't stop!  God isn't finished with me (us) yet!

Good News, Guys...

...I'm still preggo!!!  Woohoo!  PTL! :)

I still don't think it's quite hit me yet.  Don't get me wrong---I'm definitely excited!  I'm over-the-moon!! I think because of our last cycle, I'm definitely more focused on getting over one hurdle at a time before getting all cray-cray and rushing out to open a baby registry. (I'm only joking about this part...maybe, lol. ;) ) Tomorrow's hurdle is Beta #2, and hopefully we'll clear it and be able to breathe a little easier! 

Even though I'm remaining cautious, I do have to admit...I frequently look at my beautiful BFP and my sweet little snow babies' pics.  And by "frequently", I mean at least once every few hours, lol.  Both pictures make me smile ear to ear every single time, too!  It's amazing to think that God's miracle(s) is/are growing inside me even as we speak!  Eeek!!

Alrighty, folks...it's nap time!  All this baby-making sure is exhausting! lol I'll post the results as soon as I get them tomorrow, so be sure to check for updates sometime after 1pm! 

Beta #1

Well, guys...it's that time again.  And I have to say, I'm in a state of shock right this minute, so forgive me if I ramble.

(Before we go any further, let me remind you of what my last first beta was: 23.  At this point, Dr T likes to see levels of at least 50.  My "personal goal" was 46, just because I figured that was close enough without being too low...I like to set realistic goals for myself, lol.)

Ok, so my first beta came back at...

473.

Yes, you read that correctly.  Four-hundred and seventy-three.  I'M PREGNANT!!!!!  And by the look of this number, I'm VERY pregnant!

All I can keep saying is, "Thank you, Lord!  God is so good!  Thank you, Father!" I still can't believe it! Eeeeeek! I'm so excited I can't stand it!

Now, I had a tiny hunch the first beta would be positive (although not THAT high) becaaaaaause...I saw this little beauty at 4am this morning!

I know, I know, you think I'm weak, don't you?  Well, I was actually planning on testing on Beta Day since the beginning!  I only had one test left in the pack, so I saved it for the perfect moment...and don't you think 4am is the perfect moment???! lol

After I snuck into the bathroom and took the HPT (and after my initial shock wore off), I quietly placed it on top of my husband's work clothes that were laid out for the day and then crawled back into bed (where I tossed and turned for the next two and a half hours while I waited for his alarm to go off).  Of course, he found it as soon as he went to get dressed, and sleepily shuffled into the bedroom where he muttered, "You're ridiculous", with a huge smile on his face.  I think he underestimates my sneakiness...;)

Needless to say, we're both OVERJOYED with this news!  My heart is literally overflowing with love and peace right now!  However, we're trying to remain realistically cautious, knowing that the next beta could yield not such fabulous news.  All we can do is thank God for this blessing and pray that He continues us down this path if He sees fit!

So, what's next, you ask?  Well, Beta #2 is scheduled for Wednesday at 9am, and Dr T is looking for it to have at least doubled in that time period.  That means that 946 is my new "personal goal"! lol

Please keep praying for our precious miracles to stay strong and keep growing, and for my levels to continue to rise appropriately.  And, as always, give the glory to God, for Revelation 4:11 says, "You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power; for You created all things, and by Your will they were created and have their being."  Amen!

In Just Twenty-Four Hours...

...we should know whether these snow babies decided to hang around a little longer or not!  Who's excited??? I AM!!

Even though I am having my blood drawn at 9am, my results won't be back until some time after lunch (so around 1pm).  I will definitely be a ball of nerves until I get that call!  I'm a mess right now just thinking about it! Ahhhh!

I'll update you all as soon as I know something.  Please keep praying for calmed-nerves, God's will, and peace no matter what the results!  To God be the glory! :)

9dp5dt---Almost There!

Technically, I'm 14 dpo today.  That means I could POAS and very likely get an accurate result IF I were to totally break down and give into the HPT Craziness.  But I'm not!  I'm staying strong, people...or at least attempting to!  Only two more days left!  Eeeeek!

For all you Symptom Seekers out there (like myself, lol), here's what I've been noticing/feeling the last few days...

-stuffy nose/sore throat

-muscle spasms/cramps in legs (I know that sounds crazy, but I've heard that is a "symptom", and I DID notice this last cycle, too!)

-mild pressure/pulling/pinching in uterus and ovary area (comes and goes)

-mild nausea (mostly at night, but yesterday I was queasy almost all day)

-lower backache (but this could be from being a couch potato, too...lol)

-bloating

-headache (last night and today)

-feeling dehydrated (tired, dizzy at times, really yellow urine---TMI) even though I'm drinking a lot

-achy joints (hips, knees, ankles), more so at night

-restlessness

So that's it.  No cramping or spotting (which I had on this same day last cycle)---PTL!  How do those symptoms sound to y'all??  I know I say I'm going to try not to dwell on how I'm feeling so much, but man, is it hard not to!  Every little pinch or queasy feeling I'm like "Oh!  What was that?  Was that from the babies??"  Ok, seriously, I know.  I have a problem.  I need to seek professional help for my Symptom Seeking, lol.

As obsessed as I am, I really am trying to remember that this is all in God's hands, and that He already knows the outcome.  No matter what the symptoms, no matter how many tests I pee on, HE knows what's really going on inside my body and whether or not these babies are meant to be ours. Hopefully He'll bless us with encouraging news on Monday! :)

6dp5dt---Having an Off Day

The mood swings are back, people.  Ugh.  I'm happy, I'm sad, I'm annoyed, I'm excited...I'm just one big, jacked-up emotional mess over here! lol  But we're allowed to have an off day every now and then, right??  Right??  That's what I thought. ;)

So, what's been triggering my moodiness? To be honest, there's no tellin' anymore! lol  Usually it comes and goes quickly, but there has been one thing that's been on my mind all day...so I figured I'd share it with you guys in hopes that it'll clear out the sadness and make that horrible pre-cry prickly feeling in my nose that's been there all day go away!  Thanks in advance for "listening", y'all!

Today, I've been thinking about (what else) babies.  I know, that's a little vague, and babies ALWAYS make me cry, so what's new, right?? To be more specific, I've been thinking about this (possible) pregnancy, how much it truly means to us, and how our views on parenthood has really evolved over the last few years.  Let me explain.

Growing up (and actually right before getting married), I used to think I wanted to wait to have babies. I wanted to travel with my husband, establish our home, enjoy time with our friends, maybe occasionally entertain their kids, and then eventually have some of our own.  I also had a skewed view on motherhood...I wanted the joys of pregnancy (the cute little belly, the chic maternity clothes, the showers), but not the more "unattractive" parts (the stretch marks, the vomiting, the overall body changes, and the actual delivery).  I wanted to experience the fun of having an infant (dressing them up, rocking them to sleep, holding their little hands), but not the other experiences that comes later in motherhood (the "Terrible Twos", the never-ending messes, the school projects, and the teenage years).  To be honest, I just wasn't ready at the time.

My husband and I started TTC way sooner than initially discussed, mainly because we weren't getting any younger (he was twenty-nine and I was almost twenty-six) and we wanted to be able to enjoy our kids before it was time for walkers and wheelchairs (that's him talking, not me, lol).  We had only been married eleven months, whereas our "plan" had been to wait for three to five years.  Although we were bumping up the plan a bit, we were in no way ready for actual parenthood.  My husband was, of course, scared to death to think about becoming a father, and I was still anticipating all of the "good stuff" mentioned above, without actually be prepared for the other stuff that comes along with being a parent.  I figured we had nine months to prepare right??  Ha.  Little did we know that this would be a looooong journey in which we would learn a lot about each other, ourselves, our faith, our marriage, and what it actually means to be a parent.

Through these last two (plus) years, my husband has definitely warmed up to the idea of someone calling him "Daddy",  of someone being truly dependent on him for a good portion of their lives, and of someone he can nurture and mold into a respectable individual.  He no longer thinks solely about the responsibilities of being a dad, but also about the joy it will bring into his life.  He's eager to learn how to do the routine "baby stuff" (like feeding and burping an infant), teach them things, play soccer with them, watch them get excited over their first Christmas, and (as he told me today) "embarrass them when they're teenagers".  He's changed a lot, and I can honestly say he's "ready".  Maybe I'm a little biased, but I think he'll make an AMAZING father.

I, too, have changed a lot.  I have learned that I want so much more than just the good stuff. I want the sleep deprivation, the messy diapers, the task of searching for the perfect daycare, going school-clothes shopping, packing lunches every day, tucking them into bed, wiping their snotty little noses, grounding them "for life", picking out prom dresses, and eventually picking out a wedding dress.  I want the good along with the bad; I want the joys and the sorrows.  I want the proud moments along with the disappointing ones; the smiles and the tears.  I want the whole package.  I want to be a mommy more than anything in this world, and I pray with all my heart that God blesses me with the opportunity one day.

Ok, that's all.  Sadness over.  I don't know about you, but I've had enough crying for one day!  Thanks for letting me get that off my chest; you guys are the best listeners EV-ER! Now, tomorrow, I promise to be more upbeat and chipper!  I'd better be, because tomorrow is my twenty-eighth birthday!  Bet you can't guess what I'll be wishing for when I blow out those candles! ;)

Today's E2 and P4 Results

I have the results from this morning's appointment, and things are looking fab-u-lous! PTL!

My E2 (estrogen) level today was 332, and my P4 (progesterone) was 27.6  This is better than my last cycle, when my E2 was 323 and P4 was only 21.  (Remember, they like the P4 to be roughly 10% of the E2, so we're not far off this time!)  I am to stay on all of the same doses of my medications, and we'll see what's cookin' in this oven-o'-mine next Monday at the first beta check!

Now, I was concerned about the fact that my E2 has dropped since the last pre-transfer appointment (on November 2nd), so (you know me) I had to ask the nurse! ;)  She said it is actually supposed to go down during this time, because technically I am in the "luteal phase" of my cycle, which is the time between when a woman ovulates and when her next cycle starts.  The E2 builds up before a woman ovulates, then once she does, it drops and continues to drop until either a) an embryo implants and begins to cause the levels to increase again, or b) it drops so low it signals a new cycle to start.  Aren't our bodies amazing??! 

So, a drop in my estrogen right now is exactly what Dr T wants, and then he hopes for it to start to rise later this week and early next week IF my little peanuts do, in fact, implant!  I'm so glad she explained that to me---now I can breathe easy!  Looks like I'm still on the right track to Baby Town, folks! 

Symptom-wise, I'm not feeling too shabby...just a few pinches and pulls here and there (yay!!), pretty tired, and really bloated (ugh).  The bloating could quite possibly be from the progesterone shots (especially since my P4 levels are nice and high right now), but man, does it make a girl feel "blah"!  But I'll definitely take feeling "blah" if it means I'll get to hear those three WONDERFUL words next week: "Congratulations!  You're pregnant!" In fact, I'd probably shave my head, get my entire body waxed, and let Dr T catheterize me twelve times just to hear those words (and for everything to be okay)! LOL Okay, maybe the catheter is a little much...but at least now you know I'm serious!  I want this!! ;)

Alrighty, that's all for now!  I'll check in again soon!  

3dp5dt---Is There Anybody In There??

So, here we are: day three.  I have to say, things are pretty quiet down in the ole' uterus department!  

I know that sometimes frozen embies take longer to "wake up" than those fresh out of the lab, but I've got to be honest---I wish my little peanuts would stop napping and start implanting! lol This Lil Mama is ready to feel some action in there! :)

While we wait for the babies to get cozy, I'm going to keep resting, relaxing, and praying for God's will to be done!  I go back to Dr T tomorrow morning at 9am for my estrogen and progesterone to be checked, so I will let you all know when I get the results!

1dp5dt

Well guys, it's the first day after the transfer, and I'm feeling pretty good!  It's too early for true "symptoms", but I can say that I'm very tired (probably from all of the excitement from the last few weeks!) and having some mild ovarian pain (which I also had last time).  No pinching, pulling, or cramping yet, but hopefully that will come in the next few days to let me know our Peanuts are trying to get cozy!

I read this verse in this morning's devotional and had to share it: "...Blessed are those who wait on the Lord." (Isaiah 30:18) The last twenty-six months have definitely been long and tiring, but I know the blessings my God has in store for us will be well worth the wait! :)

I'll post more in the next few days, but in the meantime, please keep those prayers coming!  Your love, support, and prayers mean so much to my husband and I, and we can't thank you all enough!

Only ten days left till the first pregnancy test! Yaaaaay!

Details From Today's Transfer

Well, after what felt like a long day, I am proud to say that FET #2 is complete!  The snow babies and I are at home safe and sound and I am trying to rest up and let these puppies hibernate!  Here are the details from today:

My MIL (my ride and support for today since my husband couldn't be there again) and I got there on time at 10am.  There were several ladies in the waiting room, so I had a feeling we may have to wait a few minutes before being brought back.  Well, almost two hours later, I was finally called back to have my consult with Dr T!  (Apparently, they were really busy today and had seven FET's to do, and I happened to be the last one of the day.)  I really didn't mind the wait, except that my full bladder (needed for the ultrasound) was becoming quite painful! lol  

So, we met with Dr T and he told us that both embies survived the thaw (PTL!) and both looked great! Of course, being the proud mommy I am, I had to bring the picture of them home for y'all to see! Here they are: Peanut 1 & 2!

Their "grades" are 5AC (on the left) and 3BB, and both were assisted in the "hatching" process, which means the embryologist poked a little hole in their shell so they can fully hatch and implant.  They look very similar to FET #1, don't they?? Dr T said both grades are considered "good" quality, and he was very happy with the way they look.  That's enough for me---a happy doctor makes for a happy patient! ;)

I was finally wheeled back into the OR, and as I was getting "in position", I literally thought my bladder was going to rupture.  When the u/s tech put the wand to my stomach, she and Dr T both said, "Whoa! That's quite the impressive bladder you have there!  How do you stand it being that full??" (To which I answered, "I'm a nurse!  We don't have time to pee!  I get used to it!" lol)  Then he said, "Sorry, but we're going to have to drain it a little now or we won't be able to see your uterus at all.  Your bladder is pushing it off the screen!"  So then came the dreaded foley catheter...ouch.  But this time, I was in so much pain from the full bladder that I actually welcomed the catheter if it meant some relief!

A few minutes later, my bladder and I were good to go.  My lining looked nice and purdy (measuring 11mm---perfecto!) and Dr T was able to guide the kiddos right in there and drop them off in the perfect spot.  I tell ya, that is an awesome sight to see your babies placed in your uterus for what could possibly be the next nine months of their lives!  What a miracle!

After the drop-off came yet another catheter (double ouch) to fully drain my bladder.  Then I had a wedge placed under my tush and was taken back to recovery, where I (once again) stood on my head for thirty minutes.  The nurse then came in and gave me my discharge instructions (start baby aspirin tomorrow, stay on my doses of estrogen and progesterone, and no sex/hot tubs/tub baths), and then I was on my way home!

Right now, I'm feeling great (although pretty tired) and totally stress-free!  I know in my heart that God has this all under control, and that makes all the difference!  I'll go back Monday at 9am for an estrogen and progesterone check, and then have to wait another full week until the first beta, which is scheduled for November 19th at 9am (eeeeeeeeek!).  All I can do now is relax, rest up, and let God work His miracle thru/in me!  Don't worry, I'll keep you guys posted on what's happening! ;)

Tooooomorrow! Tooooomorow! You're Only a Day Away!

It's almost time, folks!  The Big Day is right around the corner!  Eeeek!

The transfer is set for 10am tomorrow morning.  I will have another brief consult with Dr T to discuss our snow babies quality and how they survived the thaw.  Then I will go through the same procedure as last time (ouch), followed by sitting on my head for thirty minutes (lol).  After that, it's to the big fluffy chair I go for the next few days!  Bring it on!

Just like last time, I'm not nervous in the least, but I am soooo excited I almost can't stand it!  I am totally ready for this next adventure and to walk down this path God is leading us on!  The embies, the procedure, and the outcome are all in the Father's hands, and I know He will continue to execute His perfect plan through me!

As I wait in anticipation for tomorrow morning, I am keeping this verse close to my heart: "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your path straight." (Proverbs 3:5-6) That's just what I intend to do! :)

Alrighty, it's time for dinner and some relaxation time with the hubs!  I'll post tomorrow with details of the kiddos and how things went, so stay tuned!  And, as always, thank you all for praying for my husband, myself, and our precious miracles!

Friday's Appointment

I know, I know...I'm two days late filling you all in.  Sorry!  Friday just flew by, and then I spent literally all day yesterday out of town.  But I'm been eager to share my good news from Friday with you guys, so here it is!

My lining was a whopping 8.8mm!  PTL, PTL, PTL!  My measurement at this appointment during my last cycle was only 6.1mm (which was down more than a millimeter from the appointment before), so I am beyond ecstatic that it didn't just go up this time around, but it's almost at the goal of 10-13mm!  God is so good!!

I missed getting to talk to the nurse when she called to let you me know about my estrogen level and what medications to take until the transfer date, so I don't know the actual number (bummer).  But she left a message saying things were looking good and that I am to stay on the same dose of 8mg of estrogen a day (divided up into two pills in the morning and two in the evening so I won't get queasy), finish up my last dose of Lupron (which I did Friday night), and then start the progesterone shots (1mL in the hiney every night), with the first being last night.

So that's it!  That's all my news for now!  I'm feeling GREAT and trusting that God is going to do big, BIG things this week!

Only FOUR more days!!!!  Ahhhhh!

P.S: I'm expecting a call Tuesday with the time of the transfer, so I'll keep you all posted!

More Good Numbers!

My appointment this morning went grrrreat!  We're getting closer every day to the numbers I need to reach to be "transfer ready"!  How exciting!

My estrogen today was 270, which is steadily heading in the right direction!  (It was 208 on Monday, and 63 before that.)  The nurse thought I would be up to 400 already (which is where they want me to be for the Big Day), but said that it's okay that I'm not quite there yet since we have a whole week left for it to rise.  I am to take three estrogen pills tonight and then start with four pills tomorrow (which will bring me to 8mg a day).  My Lupron dose still stays the same at 5 units every night.

My lining measurement was equally as pleasing...it's grown to 7.6mm already!  That's a growth of exactly 2mm in two days, which is awesome!  It still looks "nice and bright" according to the u/s tech, which is something they like to see since it helps Dr T to guide the embryos into my uterus on the day of the transfer.  They will recheck my lining (and my estrogen) at my last (yay!) pre-transfer appointment on Friday at 9am.

The nurse said they are very happy with my progress so far this cycle, and that my numbers are already higher than they were at this point in the last cycle.  What a blessing!  I know that God is working through me...growing my lining, raising my estrogen, and preparing my body for the arrival of His little miracles!  I just can't wait to see what He's going to do next!  Luckily, I won't have to wait too much longer, because....

T minus eight days!!!  Gaaaaah!

Good News Monday!

Well, today has been a good day!  Not only did I finish up my last ever week on call (I survived---woohoo!), but I also got a good report from Dr T at my appointment this morning!

My estrogen level was 208 today (this is up from 63 last Wednesday), which is right on track with what Dr T wants it to be.  They increased the dose of my estrogen pills from two to three tablets a day (standard protocol), and the Lupron dose stays the same (5 units every night).  The nurse said they like to see levels of 400 by the day of the transfer, and at the rate I'm going, she thinks I'll meet this "goal" by Wednesday.  Yay!

My lining was at 5.6mm (increased from 5mm Wednesday), which is great considering I have been (TMI alert) bleeding like a stuck pig for five days straight after stopping the BCP!  Denese said this thickness is normal for this point in my cycle and that with the increase in estrogen (and since my period has stopped---PTL), I should jump up to the 10-13mm range pretty quickly!  We still have a little over a week though (ten days to be exact!), so we're not in a rush.  As long as it's nice and plush and they're able to see it well on the ultrasound during the transfer, we're good to go!

So I go back for more bloodwork and another ultrasound Wednesday morning at 7AM.  I'll have one more appointment on Friday, and then I'm "off" (well, no more appointments, at least) till the Big Day!

As we're drawing closer to the transfer date, I ask that you all please continue to pray for everything to stay on track and for God's will to be done.  We are putting this completely in His hands, knowing that He will protect, guide, and bless us according to His plan!

T-Minus Eleven Days

Man, oh man.  I feel like it's been ages since I've posted!  Sorry, guys!  I've been on call all week and weekend, and I've been working nonstop!  I will definitely remember my last time on call...maybe not in a good way, but I'll remember it! lol

So, for a little update...my shots are still going well.  I began the estrogen pills Friday night, starting with one pill and the increasing it to two last night and tonight.  I go to Dr T at 7AM tomorrow for more bloodwork and an ultrasound.  Praying for good news!  I'll blog again tomorrow with the latest results!

It's getting closer....eeeeeek! :)

Rough Day (Whine Alert)

Let me clarify: the appointment went fine and everything is a-okay!  It was just the rest of the day that was "blah"!

I didn't get any specifics on my lining or estrogen level today.  They said my uterus "looks good", and that my levels "were great", and I am to start my Estrogen pills (2mg) Friday night (taking one that night and then two Saturday and Sunday night).  I didn't really ask for details this time, since I know we have a full two weeks to go before The Big Day, so I have plenty of time to grow that cushy lining and raise that estrogen!

I also didn't ask for numbers because they told me I could expect good ole' Aunt Flo again any day (since I stopped the BCP Sunday night), which would decrease the thickness of my lining and estrogen level anyway.  And boy, were they right.  About thirty minutes after leaving the office, I started cramping something wicked.  And then, right smack in the middle of my Wednesday morning meeting, she showed up.  How kind of her to grace me with her presence...NOT!

I don't know what it is about a woman's cycle, and maybe I'm just a wimp (this is highly likely---just ask my husband, lol), but it'll take the energy right out of ya!  For the rest of the morning, I felt sluggish and just "icky".  It doesn't help that I am coming down with a cold (gifted to me from my family who came to visit...thanks guys! It was worth getting to see y'all though! :) ) and have been congested and achy for the last few days.  I think the combination of the two have really just zapped me of any spunk and drive I had left for the week.  I'm done!  I'm throwing in the towel! (Or maybe I should throw in the sanitary pad or kleenex...lol.)

Okay, enough whining for one day.  On a brighter note: at least it's Wednesday evening!  That means only fourteen days of work left and fifteen days till our little snow babies come home!  Even in my state of ickiness and germ-infestation, that makes me one happy camper!  Now, time for some Midol, cold medicine, and hot tea...night guys! :)

Minor Change in Plans

I got a call from Dr T's nurse yesterday asking if I could come in tomorrow (Wednesday) morning instead of Friday morning for my first routine appointment.  (I assume it's because they have some many women going through IVF, they are trying to spread the appointments out a little more to save their sanity, lol.)  My answer: of course!  The sooner, the better!  So I go in tomorrow morning at 7am to see how this little lining of mine is growing and how my estrogen level is holding up.  Please send up a little prayer for me in the morning if you can! Thank you in advance!

Now, I know what you're thinking, and no, unfortunately this doesn't mean the transfer has been bumped up at all.  Bummer, huh?!  I will just skip going at all on Friday and then keep my scheduled appointments for next Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.  The transfer is still planned for the following Thursday morning (time is yet to be determined).

So, let me do a little math here...(taking off my shoes)...eight plus eight...carry the one...yep.  Got it. Per my calculations...there are only sixteen days left until The Big Day!!  Yaaaay!  Are you as excited as I am??  I highly doubt it; in case you haven't noticed, I'm pret-ty giddy over here! ;)  Come on, November 8th!

What's On This Week's Agenda

This week there will be a lot going on as far as medication changes and my first routine appointment with Dr T.  Exciting stuff will be happening here, folks! Well, exciting to me, anyway! lol

Tonight, I will take my last BCP.  I will also start my five-day course of antibiotics (Zithromax) to make sure I don't have any little infections brewing before the Big Day.  I'll continue the Lupron shots, but decrease them from 10 units to 5 units starting tonight.

This Friday, I will see Dr T first thing in the morning to draw my estrogen level and for an ultrasound.  Then, that night, I will start taking the estrogen pills to get that lining nice and fluffy for our little house guest!

Just a little heads up for those of you who check my blog daily: I am on call starting tomorrow thru next Monday (ugh...), and I am also training someone to take my place at work, so I may be a tad bit busy and not able to blog every day.  But I promise I'll keep you all posted on any changes and on how I'm feeling (i.e.: crazy mood swings, weird dreams, or just random share-worthy thoughts) whenever possible!  Oh, and of course, I'll let you know how my appointment goes on Friday!  Until then, please keep on praying! :)

T-minus eighteen days!  Ahhhhhh!

Today's Thought-Provoking Devotional

Ahhh....Saturday.  My favorite day of the whole week!  Sometimes I spend it resting, sometimes hanging out with friends and family, and sometimes (more often than I'd like) I spend it running around like a headless chicken.  This particularly beautiful Saturday is being spent---you guessed it---doing the latter!  I've been a busy little bee this morning and am crossing things off my never-ending To Do List.  But hey, at least I'm being productive, right?? :)

My favorite way to start off my Saturdays (or any day of the week, actually!) is to read my devotional (I'm still reading Jesus Lives, by Sarah Young).  It never fails to bless my morning and get my heart and mind in the right place!

This morning's message was especially directed to me; it was referring to Matthew 7:7, where the Lord says, "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened for you." My favorite part of today's message says: "I encourage you to pray freely...Nonetheless, when you bring me your petitions, you need to keep in mind that depth of My wisdom and knowledge.  This will protect you from being presumptuous or manipulative.  I never fail to hear your prayers and answer them wisely, but I do not always grant your petitions---no matter how heartfelt they may be and how utterly right they may seem.  If it becomes clear that My will differs from what you have requested, the best response is to say simply, 'Yes, Jesus.'  This will draw you closer to Me, even in the midst of your disappointment.  Though My ways---My methods, My paths---may be mysterious from your perspective, I assure you they are good."

Many people assume that if you ask God for something, He will give it to you.  Not necessarily.  God isn't like a vending machine that you can push a button on and expect what you want to fall at your feet.  He does always answer our prayers, but we have to remember that sometimes He answers them with a "no".  It doesn't mean God doesn't love us or wants to punish us; it just means that what we're asking for isn't part of His flawless plan for us!  But just because He doesn't give us exactly what we asked for, that doesn't mean He doesn't bless us in other ways.  Sometimes, these blessings take us by surprise and totally surpass what we originally prayed for!  We just have to remember that God knows what He's doing; this isn't His first rodeo! ;)

I have to remind myself of this on a daily basis.  As much as we hope and pray that this next FET will work, and as hard as it is to think about another disappointment, I know that God may (once again) say "no".  It may not be in His plan for us this year, or it may not be in His plan for us at all.  This doesn't mean I won't continue to go down this path the Father is leading me on; I know He knows where this path will lead, and He wouldn't have put me on it for no reason!  My heartfelt prayer is that if we are not meant to be parents, He will take this burning desire from our hearts and replace it with peace.  And that, no matter what, I will continue to serve Him through this journey by remaining faithful, sharing His amazing grace and mercy with others, and seeking His will for my life!

Just a Quicky

Phew.  I've survived another work week...but just barely! I feel pretty mentally and physically drained. Luckily, I only have nineteen days to go and then I'm off for an entire month before starting my new job!  I can't wait!

This is going to be a super short blog tonight; this is my first time sitting down and relaxing since getting home, so I more than likely will pass out within the next thirty minutes. (Yes, I am old, lol.)  But I wanted you all to know that things are moving right along, the shots are going smoothly, and (major PTL moment here, folks) my headaches are gone!  God is so good!

I'll post more tomorrow---promise!  But right now, I think there's a cup of chamomile tea and some mindless TV calling my name...night, y'all! :)

Call Me Crazy...

...but I am actually looking forward to starting these shots tomorrow night!  I know, I've gone batty!  

I think the main reason for being so eager is pretty obvious: so the transfer date can get here sooner and I can welcome my snow babies back home!  Woohoo!

The other reason I'm itching to get these injections started is that, believe it or not, the higher levels of hormones have been doing wonders for my migraines!  I've noticed that during both the fresh and frozen cycles, I only had ONE mentionable headache (and that was after I had to lay at such an odd angle after the transfer).  For anyone who knows me, you know that's a-ma-zing!  Then, once I stopped the medications and my hormone levels returned to "normal", the headaches started back up.  I think I've had one every day (although not always severe) since my period started...yuck.  So, needless to say, I'm ready to get those hormones back up!  I'll take crying over stupid movies, dreaming about freakishly weird stuff, and having chronic brain farts over a migraine any day! Hands down! LOL

Now, tomorrow is our third anniversary, and we're going on a date after work ("brown-chicken-brown-cow"<----that's my attempt at "sexy" music...weak attempt, I know! lol), so I may not be able to blog about my first shot after I give it tomorrow night.  Forgive me, guys!  I'll try to blog as soon as possible to let you all know how the shots are going (and if my headaches are getting any better)!

Until then...T-minus twenty-three days!  Eek!!!

FET Schedule, Take 2!

Alrighty, people...we have the schedule!  And my medications are en route to be delivered tomorrow afternoon (they have to be Fed-Ex'd from a speciality pharmacy up in Maine).  Let's get this party started!

As far as medications go, I will start my Lupron shots (10 units every night) next Wednesday (the 17th) which happens to be our third anniversary of blissful marriage!  So it'll be a great day all around! Dinner, dessert, a movie, and hormone injections---what more could a girl ask for! lol

I'll finish up my BCP the following Sunday (the 21st), and then be seen in the office for my first routine labs/ultrasound that Friday (the 26th).  After that, things are likely to be changed or added, so I'll keep you posted as we go along!

I still haven't heard anything back on my thrombophilia panel, and I'm hoping that no news is good news!  But, of course, I wouldn't start the Lovenox until after the transfer (like I did the baby aspirin), so there's always a chance Dr T could write a prescription for it immediately following the transfer (again, like he did the aspirin).  I'm not going to fret about it, but I'll probably mention it to the nurse at my appointment on the 26th.  You know, just to ease my curiosity. ;)

So there ya go! Looks like things are headed in the right direction...now I'm just hoping and praying that my lining will cooperate and that November 8th will get here quickly!

I Have Grrrrreat News...

...and, believe it or not, it has nothing to do with IVF or infertility!

I am super ecstatic to say that I accepted an offer yesterday for my dream job...to be a Labor and Delivery nurse!  Eeeeek!  This is what I've wanted to do ever since before nursing school!

This is such an unexpected blessing because I wasn't really looking for a new job!  God opened this door back in August, while I was visiting a patient of mine.  I started talking to her granddaughter, who turned out to be the Director of Nursing on an OB floor (Labor and Delivery, Postpartum, Antepartum, Nursery) in our area.  She encouraged me to apply for a position, but I was hesitant because we were gearing up for our first FET, so I pushed the thought into the back of my mind.  I kept praying that if it's what God wanted me to do, He would keep the door open and guide me through it.

For some reason, after the chemical pregnancy, I started having this feeling like God was telling me to pursue this opportunity further.  After much discussion and prayer, my husband and I decided last week that I should go ahead and interview, and if it wasn't God's will for me, He would shut the door.

I had my interview yesterday, and was definitely a ball of nerves going in!  But I kept reminding myself that God would undoubtedly guide me where He wanted me to go.  Well...God didn't just guide me through the door---He YANKED me through that puppy!  I got a call with an offer before I ever even made it home!  Craziness!  This is just another reminder of how GOOD my God is!

As eager as I am to jump on this new career path, I am planning on making Wednesday, November 7th (the day before the transfer) my last day at my current job.  Then, after the transfer, I will take a full month off (woohoo!) to grow those little babies and prepare myself for my new job!  I'll start general orientation at the hospital on Monday, December 10th, and then begin unit orientation the following week.  I have a feeling with all that's going on, these next two months are going to FLY by!

I feel so incredibly blessed to start along this path God has chosen for me.  James 1:17 says, "Every good and perfect gift is from above...", and that includes new jobs, snow babies, and every other amazing blessing the Lord has showered upon me!  :)